But wait! There’s more!

By John Pierre | Nov 06, 2013

I'm sure getting tired of the bait and switch, questionable advertisements that appear about every three-and-a-half minutes on the boob tube.

I'll admit that I am addicted to television (I guess that makes me an honorary boob) as I love most of the old-time programming.  I even enjoy some, not all, of the modern stuff.

I get tired of myriad pitches of various remedies that are claimed to grow hair on a bowling ball or be an absolute cure for every malady from blackheads to hemorrhoids and everything in between.

One such ad even tries to peddle something that will make your toe nails look beautiful.  Normally (if you are normal) your toe nails are ensconced in stockings unless you're bare footing it around wearing those unfortunately popular flippity-floppities or are at the beach preparing to take a dip.

Pardon me, but who spends much time inspecting your toe nails other than a podiatrist or someone with a foot fetish?

Are some people gullible enough to buy into that garbage?  Some must be, or how else would these companies have money to spend millions of dollars on an onslaught of these many-times-a-day advertisements?  Each one of them cajoles you to call immediately in order to take advantage of their "special" offer.

But heck… if you order in the next 15 minutes, (they run each of these ads several times a day) they'll send you an extra cushion for your bottom.  I guess that's for folks who have two bottoms.  Just pay extra shipping and handling.  Would you suppose that is a small amount?  Suppose again.

What about the ad having something to do with being comfortable while sitting on their special cushion?  Who ever heard of an 18-wheeler driver talking about making his bottom "comfy?"

By the way, those long haul tractors (that's the word for a truck set up to pull a long trailer in case you didn't know) are equipped with pneumatic springs under the seat that makes the ride very comfortable for the driver as the seat absorbs all of the bumps in the road.  I know because, in my former life in the car and truck rental business, I drove some of 'em.

How about the obviously photo-shopped picture of a substantially overweight woman in a pose identical to the model-like slender woman who is supposed to be her "after" picture showing her amazing weight loss in a reduction program for only a few dollars a day including multiple meals?

Can you imagine a pudgy female posing in the exact position of her alleged "after" picture, including the two-piece bathing suit?  C'mon, you can't possibly be taken in by that.

Another ad aimed at a somewhat overweight women offers something that is surprisingly similar to the age-old corset.  It might be there is a modest difference from the old device as some of them utilized whale-bone stays, but it is still a corset.  Again, the "after" picture appears Photo-Shopped.

Well shucks.  As long as there are doofuses (or should that be doofi?), the constant assault on our intelligence will continue… but hopefully Edmonds folks aren't among the easily duped.

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