Speed reading, fast talking and military channel diction

Maybe some of these folks should be referred to their pastor or priest to learn about calvary.
By John Pierre | Jun 21, 2012

How long has "speed reading" been around?

It seems that I can remember it way back when I was just knee high to a toad stool.

The idea of it never struck me right.  Getting through a book in record time held little appeal for my reading appetite.  I prefer to digest each carefully chosen word written by an author.

The good ones paint a picture with words... like John Steinbeck or, just recently my new favorite, Bernadette Pajer.

It would be a sin to "speed read" one of their books.

What brought this to mind was listening to some television program hostess' "speed talking."

Call me sexist if you will but it seems to be mostly the women who are afflicted with the need to spit words out as rapidly as an AK-47 submachine gun spits out bullets.

And, to me, they all look the same.  All of them seem to be bleached blondes with identical hairdos and always parted in the middle revealing the dark roots.

I wouldn't mind as they are mostly handsome wenches and properly proportioned but my problem is that they are talking 85 miles an hour while I'm only capable of listening at 40 mph.

I can't help but wonder why the director of these various productions doesn't hold up a prompter that says, "Slow Down" or holler that in their hidden earphones.

I suppose it could be that the script that they have been provided is too long for the allowed minutes.  Either way something is wrong causing it to be difficult for viewers/listeners.

And speaking of television on a slightly different subject, I have been watching, somewhat regularly, the Military Channel because many of the presentations are steeped in history.

However, a certain short presentation about how fantastic a certain modern jet airplane is disappoints a little.

The voiceover, posing as a military person, is explaining that our troops on the ground love the plane's strike capabilities while the enemy doesn't.  He goes on to say something to the effect that the arrival of that aircraft is seen as if "the calvary has arrived."

I can almost understand the old western movies when the cavalry is referred to as the calvary because many of the actors, deprived of a script, weren't the brightest people on our planet... but a present day military man calling it that is unforgivable.

Maybe some of these folks should be referred to their pastor or priest to learn about calvary.

I guess I'm getting' old.  I find it hard to abide "speed talking" and morons referring to the cavalry as the calvary.

D'ya reckon that's why I'm labeled a curmudgeon?

Comments (0)
If you wish to comment, please login.