Doggone good spaghettiBe honest. What helpful task has the average Edmonds mutt performed this week?
The dog breeders of western Washington should put their minds to it pretty darn quick. What we need is a new breed of dog developed and trained to eat leftover spaghetti, with or without sauce.
Through the years dogs were bred to perform helpful tasks. Some chased rats, others tended livestock, dogs hunted truffles, pulled sleds and occasionally were employed as footwarmers in unheated churches.
Be honest. What helpful task has the average Edmonds mutt performed this week? And chewing the postman's ankle doesn't count. If you go by the evidence I have observed, you would suggest that local dogs are being bred primarily for their ability to dig up bulbs, howl under windows and go baffroom in the rhododendrons.
Meanwhile, Americans are spending nearly $20 billion a year on commercial pet food. Now that's pretty dumb and obviously we must revert to an era when pets ate table scraps or whatever they could catch and drag into the back yard. Today dog owners consider family counseling if Fang appears disinterested in his evening can of Feast for Finicky Foxhounds.
The solution of course is selective breeding of hounds with a proven proclivity for leftover spaghetti. Cold. With or without sauce. Because everybody cooks too much pasta and it makes a lousy second-day sandwich.
You might start with:
ARF ARF SPAGHETTI
2 pounds hamburger meat
12 ounce can tomato paste
12 ounce can tomato puree
1 small onion
1 small green pepper
3 cloves garlic
1 1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon poultry seasoning
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon Italian seasoning
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
Brown the meat in a large skillet. Pour off the grease, add the diced onion and diced green pepper. When the veggies have softened dump in everything else and simmer for a couple of hours, adding water to thin the sauce if you prefer.
Served over cooked spaghetti this is probably enough to serve seven guests and a medium sized Bichon Frise